Is Your Dating Picker Off
What is a dating picker and how do I know it is off?
Well a dating picker is a term used to describe someone who consistently chooses the wrong type of person in a relationship. A person with a broken picker may feel excited about the initial attraction to someone, but later realize they’ve chosen the wrong person. This can lead to a pattern of self-destructive relationships
So Is your dating picker off?
Often times we are choosing the wrong people right from the get go and wondering why we are angry at dating/men/women/relationships. So right now as you are reading this I want you to take a second and ask yourself, do I see a pattern or a trend in my dating life? Am I consistently picking people who don’t treat me great/ who tend to be toxic, or maybe they all end in turmoil.
Is Your Dating Picker Off? Also another thing to ask yourself is “how is my relationship with my exe’s?” Do I get mad when I think about them? Would I say hello if they passed me in the street?
This is one indication of picking the wrong people is if you cringe thinking of these people.
Take inventory of what your current type is?
You want someone who looks good, who works out, who is ripped, and dresses well, someone who “the media” tells you is attractive, someone who you look at and say wow! But is this person a healthy individual or just someone who looks good on the surface? I see people all the time who have a “type” that doesn’t work for them.
After taking inventory, Is your dating picker off?
Attraction fades, we all grow old, life is hard, chaotic, messy & the person you choose will be your greatest asset or your greatest liability. They will see you at your worst, they will see you at your most vulnerable, they will see you crying, throwing up, sick, and going through the messiness of life & they will either be walking beside you holding your hand through it, or you will end up feeling alone in the midst of it.
Can we stop surface level dating and date for the qualities that actually matter. The things that in the long run will produce longevity in your relationship rather than a fleeting feeling of temptation. Relationships are hard, and Marriage is even harder, and it takes work. There is a reason that most marriage ends in divorce these days, because people are dating for the wrong reasons.
So Is Your Dating Picker Off and how do we change this?
Start by slowing down. Lust & attraction is fast moving, but learning someone’s character is slow. We need to be fruit inspectors, and take time to get to know someone better.
Be prayerful in your pursuit, and ask God to reveal to you anything that may be hindering you from having a healthy relationship.
Pray that the Lord open your eyes to see people the way He sees people.
Get Godly wisdom and mentors who will keep you accountable and speak truth and love into your relationships.
Is Your Dating Picker Off? Try choosing Character over Attraction … and see what happens. In the long run we all grow old, we all change, we all grow and evolve, but your future children will thank you for choosing their mother/father better. Choosing wisely isn’t just for you – it changes generations to come when you act from Godly wisdom rather than lustful attraction.
Written By Michelle Apples
Check out The Christian Singles Hub website for information on Christian matchmaking, Christian speed dating, upcoming Christian retreats, events, trips and so much more at https://thechristiansingleshub.com/
