When you start dating someone, these 8 stages of dating are crucial
Stages Of Dating #1 Get Curious– Get curious about the person in front of you. Who are they? What do they want in life? Where do they see their life going? Whats their 5-10 year timeline? Whats important to you? and does it line up with what is important to them?
This stage of dating is so important, and it connects you to the person in front of you. People find it really attractive when they see that you are genuinely intrigued by them rather than appearing bored, tired, uninterested or talking all about yourself.
But as you are asking questions don’t forget the Stages Of Dating #2 share and be vulnerable. Share who you are, what you enjoy, what makes you tick, what makes you smile etc. Use every date as a learning opportunity- learn what you like/don’t like about this person, learn about yourself, and learn your non negotiables, but don’t be afraid to be vulnerable (and no that does not mean over share) but allow someone to see a bit about who you are and the raw parts of you. Humans connect by shared experience. If you appear to be too surface with your answers it can feel cold and doesn’t advance the connection to want to continue to connect further.
Now that brings me to Stages Of Dating #3 Be Honest – Don’t date someone for the sake of dating. Don’t play with other peoples feelings and when you feel like you have enough information to decide to either continue to know someone or bust, be honest and don’t play house. It’s simply not nice to play with someone’s feelings, but that also means being mature enough to let someone know that you are not interested and then moving on.
Stages Of Dating #4 Make sure the person stimulates you intellectually & shares the same morals & values – eventually lust fades, and we all grow old- if you cannot light the fire with wit, intelligence, humour -shared values and morals than eventually the fire will burn out and you will have nothing left. Make sure you can truly talk to this person, have fun, smile, laugh and enjoy life because life is too short to be with someone who you don’t truly connect with other than surface level.
Stages Of Dating #5 Don’t project what you want on to the other person – see them as who they actually are not the pre conceived version in your head. We often make things up in our head about someone rather than get to know that person as a human being, or we get comfortable and don’t walk away in hopes that “they will change”, but the problem is when someone shows you who they are, you need to believe them and not be naive.
Stages Of Dating #5 Look at how they treat others – someone who is infatuated with you will treat you well, but if he/she doesn’t treat other people well then thats how they will treat you when the infatuation runs out.
Stages Of Dating #6 Make sure the person values you, respects you and your time. – are they always late, always on the phone, interrupts you when you are talking – these things are important.
Stages Of Dating #7 Hit eject – Don’t ignore that gut feeling that something is wrong- if you get it – hold off until you feel better and if you never do – move on.
Remember the best is yet to come, and life is too short to be with someone who isn’t God’s best for you.
Written By Michelle Apples
Check out The Christian Singles Hub website for information on Christian matchmaking, Christian speed dating, upcoming Christian retreats, events, trips and so much more at https://thechristiansingleshub.com/
Concerning Stage #3:
Also do some careful evaluation of your partner and their life. Dating is all about evaluation.
Definitely have an in-depth talk about money. The family of your future spouse will certainly want to know if you have the ability and resources to provide for their offspring. If you want them to bless the match (and help pay for the wedding, as they often do), it’s wise to “show them the money.” And, if you’re in premarital counseling as a couple, they’ll likely ask you if you can afford to get married. When they do ask that, you’ll need a better answer than “we love each other.” Don’t just show your future in-laws and premarital counselors that you want to provide for your spouse. Show them that you actually have the ability and resources to do it. That’s a great gift you can give to your future in-laws.
If you have some sort of financial hardship, or debt, or problems with saving money, well,the kind thing to do is to let your partner know about this early so this can all be carefully evaluated. Imagine dating someone, not knowing their exact financial situation, and then finding out in premarital counseling that they’re, say, in debt for some reason or other.
Love is great, but love doesn’t pay the bills. But, love should motivate you to figure out a way to pay the bills. Dating is all about evaluation, and money will be a big part of your married life. So be sure to take hard, honest, and critical look at these.