But the Lord said to Samuel, “Do not consider his appearance or his height, for I have rejected him. The Lord does not look at the things people look at. People look at the outward appearance, but the Lord looks at the heart.” 1 Samuel 16:7 (NIV).
To put this verse in context, we know this is when Samuel was looking for a new king for Israel after the Lord rejected Saul. Samuel didn’t know David. Didn’t know his name. He did not know about David’s relationship with the Lord. Samuel saw only David’s brothers since their father, Jesse, didn’t even bring him in when Samuel first arrived. David was out with the sheep.
How does this relate to dating? We’re going to revisit types and preferences once more. Like Samuel, we see what we like and say, “The Lord has chosen this one for me.” We repeat the same habits.
We see the outward and superficial. Have we taken time to look at the heart? The character? Again, this does not rule out attraction and chemistry, but as we all know, this can’t be the foundation. It takes more than looks to keep a healthy relationship.
You never know. The person you looked over could have been the spouse you prayed for. What if ladies he was the man of your prayers, but under six feet? The stuff we see in movies and television has clouded some of our judgment. I’d rather have the man of my prayers over my dreams, knowing God will fulfill my dreams, too. Why? He knows the desires of my heart.
Men? You’ll never know if she was the woman you prayed for. Maybe she was quieter or more extroverted than you liked. What preference didn’t she meet that made you say, “no way?”
Now this doesn’t negate having standards, but for some of us, our lists of qualifications for a spouse are a bit much. Who’s perfect again? No one except Jesus. So if you’re looking for “The One,” start with Him.
I can only speak for myself. My expectations in the past were not based on God’s Word. It followed what culture said. Did I pass up some good matches? I’ll never know, but when I realized I was stuck in my type, I asked God to change my heart.
Let’s not forget. God knows what you’re attracted to. Do we really think He’s going to bring just anybody into our lives? He’s only God who knows the stars in the sky by name. Why would He not know what you like? Still, He knows what you need.
Our job? Be open to His will. What if what He has surprises you? What if it is a DM message? What if it’s someone in your church you never regarded? What if it’s someone you “friend-zoned?” Again, don’t force it, but I think we can give more people a chance.
Open your eyes. Who do you see? You never know what God may do.
Check out The Christian Singles Hub website for information on Christian matchmaking, Christian speed dating, upcoming Christian retreats, events, trips and so much more at https://thechristiansingleshub.com/
Written by Daria White Osah
You can find Daria Here:
Devotional https://www.amazon.com/Dear-Younger-Me-Devotional-Personal-ebook/dp/B09QRKBRGB/
Her podcast Single Plus https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/singleplus & on Instagram @mysingleplus
